Maybe it’s just me, hanging around the kinky corners of the internet. But the term ‘vanilla’ is often responded to with distaste. Vanilla is boring. Vanilla is bland. Vanilla sex is for those that don’t know any better. So when I chat with my friend, who owns her vanilla sex life with pride, I find it refreshing. With a friend like me, she knows all about the other sexual options available to her. But she likes vanilla. She likes no thrills sex in a bed and she’s not ashamed to say so.
But Why? What’s So Great About Vanilla?
Take away the toys, the lingerie, the whips and chains. And what are you left with? Two people filled with passion and desire for one another. Without toys to simplify the job, they work harder to please their partner. They touch each other more, with no plastic or silicone getting between their naked skin. They have nothing but their own bodies to stimulate the other person. When the pool of pre-cum or self-lubrication comes there is no question as to who or what caused it. They know their partner’s body is reacting to the pleasure they provided them. And there is nothing as arousing as that feeling. Not in the world of vanilla or the world of kink.
The Vanilla Sex Connection
Of course, kinky couples have a strong sexual connection. But vanilla lovers do too. Their connection is based purely on the other person. With no distractions. Just 100% focus on their partner and both of their pleasure. They get to enjoy being in tune with each other. Their bodies moving to their own united rhythm. Their breath in sync as they work together to reach their mutual goal.
It’s The Little Things
When you’re living in a sexual world dominated by the buzz of trying new things, you sometimes forget about the greatness already there. There are things you don’t notice anymore that a vanilla lover knows not to take for granted. Things like the recognizable weight of their lover’s body. How their temperature rises as they become more aroused. The gasp you know they never meant to escape their lips. The way their body trembles as you bring them closer and closer to orgasm.
Realistic Expectations
Sometimes, just sometimes, the idea of BDSM is better than the act itself. A sex swing sounds like a great idea, but in reality, cowgirl probably gets you off better. And let’s be honest. Is there really a view quite as satisfying as someone riding you and loving it? With vanilla sex you know what you’re getting. You know you like what you’re getting. And you know you’re going to cum.
The Vanilla Sex Conclusion
Ultimately what I’m trying to say is, vanilla sex is hot! It’s not boring or bland and if it is you may just be doing it wrong. Don’t get me wrong, I have no intention of giving up my kinky stuff. But I’m ready to go back to basics occasionally. To connect on a different level. A level no less meaningful and possibly even deeper than that I have now. I can enjoy both the world of vanilla and the world of BDSM. And I’m greedy so I’m totally going to!
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If you liked this post then check out my post – You Don’t Know What Love Is!
A well presented and thought out post. All I can add that vanilla is in itself a flavour and a spice.
Yes that’s a wonderful way of putting it! And spot on!