Fifty Shades Freed I’ve Got You Love Egg Review
I know the exact moment this love egg revealed its uniqueness to me. The second it went from standard to special. The instant I knew it had exactly what every other love egg I have tried has been lacking. I had removed it from its box, lubed it up, switched it on and inserted it. Then it happened. The Fifty Shades Freed I’ve Got You Love Egg was silent. I could feel the power of the eggs buzz, but for the first time ever, I couldn’t hear it. Finally, I had found a love egg I could use in public.
The packaging for the I’ve Got You Love Egg is elegant but simple. Sleekly designed, but still just a thin cardboard box with a plastic insert. The box contains the love egg, the remote control, a storage pouch and the charging cable.
The entire Fifty Shades Freed collection is stunning. It is all created in an aubergine purple with reflective rose gold accents. The I’ve Got You Love Egg is completely body safe, made of a soft and smooth silicone. Even the removal cord of the egg is silicone, for extra hygienic play.
Immaturity confession: I giggled way too much with a friend at its amusing resemblance to sperm…
The purple spermlike egg is 3.5inches in length with a 4.5inch circumference. This is just filling enough to allow the vibrations to travel to every vaginal wall surrounding the egg. The tapered tip means I am able to insert this with no lubricant, but if I am home I still reach for a dollop of water-based slipperiness for added comfort.
The silicone remote fits snugly in the palm of my hand. Slim in design, with the three buttons to control the love eggs functions. Whilst, unfortunately, the remote control is not waterproof, the love egg is and can be played with underwater.
“Love Eggs are completely safe to use vaginally. They can not get lost as the vaginal canal is blocked at the cervix. This is not true of the anal canal. Love eggs are for vaginal insertion only.”
Charging the love egg is simple. The removal cord unscrews to reveal the charging port and the usb cable slots in. I will say though that the ridiculously short length of the usb cable is a total pain in my rear end. It is so unbelievably short that it doesn’t even reach from the plug socket to the floor. What the hell?
A full charge takes 2 hours and will give 1 hour of play.
Tip: It does arrive charged, but mine was not fully charged. Top it up before your first use or you may be left with a flat battery and a sulking vagina.
The remote control is not rechargeable and so requires a battery. One of these is supplied with the toy, but when it bites the dust the job of replacing it is in your hands. A battery powered sex toy. It’s almost retro.
With 8 patterns and 12 speeds, the Fifty Shades Freed love egg has more than enough variety to keep both you and a partner entertained. The patterns are my favourite. The changing rhythms ensure my vagina doesn’t get used to the buzzing sensation internally. They keep my bits on high alert as I anticipate the next pleasurable purr.
A thoughtfully included travel lock can be used by holding down the button on the egg for 5 seconds. If you want to take your love egg out and about (which I definitely recommend) you don’t need to worry about it randomly buzzing away in your handbag. Not only draining its precious charge but also potentially leading to embarrassment.
Okay, so we’ve got the boring bits out of the way. But how does the I’ve Got You Love Egg actually feel?
Honestly, this little egg has got so much going for it.
Inserted and switched on, I took a little knickerless walk. Granted it was around my house, I’m not that brave. I wanted to ensure the egg was light and large enough not to slip out at an inconvenient moment. And it was. I marched up and down the stairs and it stayed put. I spread my legs and did ten squats; it stayed firmly in place. My pelvic floor muscles are shamefully untoned and the egg didn’t even slip a millimetre.
Lovehoney boasts that this Fifty Shades Freed egg will respond to the remote control even up to 8 meters away. I’ve tried it. Tested it. And I can confirm it. It won’t, however, work through walls. If you can’t see your partner the egg isn’t going to pick up any arousal inducing signals.
It isn’t all praises for the Fifty Shades Freed I’ve Got You Love Egg though. If you’re a fan of rumbling vibrations, you might not get your kicks from this buzzer of a vibe. Not only is it a buzzer, but it just doesn’t have the power to leave me screaming either. I can orgasm with the egg pressed against my clit, but it is reminiscent of a mid-range vibrator. And I’d rather reach for something with more oomph.
Even the most powerful and rumbling vibrators fail to get me off internally. So, it’s no surprise that the pleasurable purr of the I’ve Got You Love Egg was more than an arouser than a means to climax.
But, I genuinely see this as a positive aspect.
If this toy had more power, it wouldn’t be anywhere near as silent as it is. For me, it has the perfect balance of noise and power that it requires. What I look for in a love egg is a toy I can use to have cheeky fun in public with a partner. One that heightens my arousal so much I have to restrain myself from tearing off their clothes in the middle of the cinema.
And that is exactly what I got with the I’ve Got You Love Egg.
With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, the Fifty Shades Freed I’ve Got You Love Egg could be the perfect investment. This is more than just any old sex toy. It is a toy you and a partner can make unforgettable memories with. It’s fun, it’s discreet and it is one hell of a sexy mood creator. It’s sharing a secret moment of naughtiness. Letting a partner control your pleasure and enjoy your reactions until neither of you can take anymore. I don’t know about you, but that is my idea of a perfect Valentine’s.
If you want to try the Fifty Shades Freed I’ve Got You Love Egg then you can purchase one for £84.99
Huge thanks to Lovehoney for sending me the Fifty Shades Freed I’ve Got You Love Egg in exchange for an honest review!
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