My First Taste of Submission
I wouldn’t say I exactly live a kinky lifestyle. I certainly don’t live the one I would like. But, I’ve taken steps into finding my way there and this post is about the first taste I had of being submissive. The first time I had my desires met and realised it was what I wanted from then on and for forever.
He came with a warning from a friend, ‘You can only fuck him. You can’t catch feelings, okay?’ She knew I had a habit of chucking all my eggs into the basket of the closest tall brunette. She wasn’t wrong to warn me. Though she could never have known just how much one night of fucking him would affect me. To fuck him once and walk away thinking I was leaving submissive sex for good. How hard it would be for me to understand that I could get those kicks elsewhere. That he was far from the only dominant in the village.
I don’t even know if I knew the term submission then. But, I remember tipsily trying to explain how I liked it rough and liked to be told what to do, whilst simultaneously trying not to fall flat on my face in skyscraper heels. I failed the latter but seemingly succeeded in the former. As we stumbled along he spanked my ass asking if that was what I wanted. Relief overwhelmed me as I finally found someone who got it.
I didn’t have to ask to be spanked… He just did it.
I wish I’d had maybe one less drink. Perhaps then I’d remember more of what happened next. I can’t even remember the colour of his eyes, only the way they looked at me. I’ve forgotten the words he used, just the way he spoke them. Mostly, I can only remember how I felt; like I could finally just relax and enjoy. He was leading the way, all I had to do was follow. There was no need to think, or worry that I was doing something wrong or forgetting something right. I didn’t have to ask for my nipples to be bitten or my hair to be pulled or my throat to be gripped. All I had to do was say yes. I could escape into a world of sweat and saliva and semen and lust. I could immerse myself entirely in my desires, knowing he was there to catch me. To firmly hold my hand and guide me.
Everything felt better through submission. His balls were more delicious because he had told me to suck them. My mouth swallowed his cock deeper because he let me gag. His hands felt more pleasurable because they roamed where he wanted. His thrusts hit harder because he knew I wouldn’t break. I was more satisfied because he was using me and enjoying me, just in the way I wanted. In the way that nobody had ever understood before. In a way I would never stop craving.
He might have been slightly younger, but he introduced me to things I’d never known. Prior to that night, he had given me my first experience of exhibitionism. Sat in the corner of a club, surrounding walls made entirely of glass, he had sunk his fingers deep inside me. I was nervous, but I let them explore my cunt as I passionately explored his mouth. Above the table my body was still, eyes locked on his, nails gripping the back of his neck. Below the table, I writhed as he stroked and thrust into the wet darkness. I let go of the hoards of people around us, just for a minute, floating in a bubble of pleasurable sensations. His fingers, his taste, his smell. He was unforgettably intoxicating.
I guess I was lucky. He could have had desires that didn’t match my own. We certainly hadn’t done any communicating past the fact that, yes, I did indeed like to be spanked. The acts themselves were really quite ‘vanilla’, what made the experience unique was the way we did them.
These are far from the perfect examples of D/s or exhibitionism. They certainly weren’t the best experiences I have had. But, he was my first taste of a sexually submissive lifestyle and he really couldn’t have tasted any sweeter.
I’m curious whether the first person who met your hidden desires is someone unforgettable to you, too?